An evening with Roberta

There comes a point in every tour's journey where you are holed up in a smaller than small town and you get excited because there is a McDonald's in walking distance for breakfast the next day. But once in a blue moon there will be a diamond in the rough where you can go and party the night away. In the town of Vandalia, OH where the highways are wide and the fast food joints a plenty, the Hot Air Balloon Lounge features karaoke for its bar guests.  Now, the Hot Air Balloon Lounge is more hot air than a lounge. However there is only one thing that could make the night more memorable than a smoky pool bar playing karaoke in a small town. And that is a small town train wreck chick.

I come to the evening with Roberta. After Brynn belted her heart out on It's all coming back to me by Celine Dion and we were a few drinks worse for wear, a woman with an outfit that was strikingly similar to Brynn's approached her to point out that particular fact.

The woman's name...was Roberta. She had short blond hair that was sprayed to an inch of its life. Her makeup could have been entered into a 'Scarrier than Joan Rivers' contest and she must have had at least 10 face lifts to create that cling to your bones stretched skin look. But of course you could not miss the fake n' bake tan that stood out in the smoky bar. Although I'm just describing the finer points of Roberta's look, it was really her personality that was her winning trait.

As the evening progressed and curiously I saw at least 5 other bar guests give Roberta a beer and a shot (what shot I don't know) she became more rambunctious and obsessed with Brynn. At one point she pulled Brynn's forehead against her own, I was so afraid that Brynn may need some bodyguard action that I asked her if she was OK, Brynn nodded to me and allowed Roberta to whisper a prayer into her ear...via a vice grip. After she was told we were all currently living in NY she began her illogical and prejudiced rant about how she opposed the fact that 'they' were building a mausoleum a block away from ground zero (to which Kyle muttered "It's a mosque but hey - semantics."). Brynn being a logical person chided her by saying "Well, you can't blame an entire race for something that one group of people did." Roberta heartily disagreed on this fact. 

After the heated debate ended there was more karaoke singing (I myself actually got up to sing a couple numbers) like Rachael singing the hit 90's classic 'Torn' or Brynn and Cameron singing 'Picture' as performed by Kid Rock and Sheryll Crow. I eventually became too tired to handle anymore Roberta antics (my confused state of being may have been because of the cocktail sized shot called the Thunder F*&% that Rachael made me chug right before I sang a Dolly Parton song) so I turned in for the night and sauntered back to the hotel room.

However the night was not yet over for the rest of the brave souls singing their hearts out over at the Hot Air Balloon Lounge. Everything from this point on are facts that I have heard from the cast. Rachael had complained that her hair was looking a bit kinky so Roberta, being the thorough bar hopper that she was, whipped out a travel size can of hairspray and sprayed  her head so much that a jersey girl from the 80's would have been proud. I even heard that later on Roberta graced the karaoke stage with her dulcet tones and sang Landslide as performed by the Dixie Chicks.

The gang wanted to sing a group number but didn't know what to do. Luckily Tom the Karaoke DJ was there to suggest Summer Nights from Grease. Now, in a grungy bar in the Midwest one would think that a show tune would be a bit out of place, part of me thinks Tom just wanted to see what would happen if they sang that song, but they took to the idea like wildfire and ended the night with a marvelous albeit maybe slightly befuddled rendition of Summer Nights.

I look back on karaoke night with fond memories. I remember Roberta dragging us onto the dance floor. I remember Roberta yelling at us and dragging us back to the dance floor when we tried to escape. I remember Roberta picking Brynn up by the waist and lifting her into the air after she sang the duet with Cameron, I marveled at the strength of this strange petite woman. I remember Roberta saying as she showed us her tattoo "I am a woman of the Lord and if you'll look at the tattoo on my lower back you'll see my devotion to God". I remember seeing her tattoo and realizing it was an infinity sign made out of barbed wire that was circling a cross they has wings on either side to symbolize her Native American heritage...yeah. 


But I also remember my jaw dropping when I heard Rachael sing a Jimi Hendrix song with flare and soul and I remember the bartender thanking us for coming in because it would have been a slow night otherwise.

So you see, there are many people across this great country who will be moved by the cast of Click, Clack, Moo but there was something about Vandalia, OH and Ms. Roberta who needed an especially large dose of Click, Clack, Fierce!

I leave you with some pictures of our karaoke night and of course the spitting image of Roberta herself, goodnight!

Brynn and her soul sister Roberta, the cautionary tale herself.

 

Kyle is getting down...or feeling those Thunder F*&$s

Sarah and Kyle in their Vandalia, OH karaoke best

This boy can croon Sinatra like nobodies business

Cameron and I are foxy

It's All Coming Back to Brynn

Every tour should have a one eyed tour cat!

We are currently in Vandalia, OH. We had two shows on the 23rd and 24th in PA at two different venues. We then traveled to Falconer, NY beginning a four day stretch of just travel interspersed with 1 day off in St. Louis. Our final destination for the end of these four days is Alma, AR where we will be performing at the Alma Performing Arts Center.
Its only the first week of tour and we are already experiencing the shenanigans that happen during the run. Our second night in PA we wanted to go out for a cold one and some bar food. There was a tavern within 5 minutes of our hotel called Captiain Jack's. The place looked respectable on the outside and it was listed online with its own website (according to Kyle). But you never truly understand the meaning of a small po-dunk town until you walk into a smoky bar and the music stops causing all 10 bar guests to stare at you (clearly aware that you are not from that town) and then the staff proceeds to ignore you. We sat down and after about 2 minutes realized that nobody was going to take the time out of their busy day to wait on us. Needless to say we scrambled out of there.

During the load out of our last show in PA we had the back doors of the theatre open to let in some natural light. After about 5 minutes the mangiest, most ugly, orange, fluffy cat I have ever scene sauntered onto the stage from outside. The cast became very excited but I instructed them not to touch it for fear it might have fleas. Not 1 minute later Brynn, who had not heard my announcement shows up in the doorway of the van where I was loading set pieces, holding the cat with a delighted look on her face saying "Look what I found!". She put the cat down and it was then that 'ugly McGee kitty' decided it would be a good idea to hack up a hairball on a set piece. Did I mention that the cat only had one eye and its tongue was lolling out of its mouth? Now you understand why I dubbed it Ugly McGee Kitty.

 We've had a long couple days and tomorrow we have a 9:00AM call for a 6 hour travel day to MO. WE have to cross Illinois and Indiana to get there. But the exciting part is we will be staying at Kyle's house for the next two nights resulting in saved per diem and home cooked meals. Mmmm. I will leave you with some pictures I have taken of the cast over the past few days:

Cameron (The Duck) striking a pose before our show.

Brynn (Jenny), Rachael (Darlene), Kyle (Loretta) and Jed's (Farmer Brown) feet laying around.

Rachael, Sarah (Maddy), Kyle and Cameron conked out in between shows.

Kyle in the Toy Story themed dressing room holding Slinky Dog

Cameron, Sarah, Jed, Me, Brynn and Rachael in front of the Keystone Theatre in Wysox, PA (Taken by Kyle)

Show and Travel Day Numero Uno

So our first show was in Viola Elementary School in a town called Suffern, NY (about 45 minutes from the city). We had one show at 10:00AM with a load in scheduled for 8:00AM. The trains were a bit wonky in the morning so a few actors were late but nothing worse than 5 minutes. After that it was smooth sailing. We had a lovely ride with beautiful weather all the way to Suffern and the cast got used to driving in the passenger van quickly (which they have dubbed Sexxxy Louise...and I am told the three Xs are necessary). We finished load in right before half hour and the kids started filing in.

Due to the nature of the space, small, the stage was a bit cramped and there was no cross over to get from one side of the stage to the other. When the actors needed to cross I told them to just keep walking and ignore the kids. Sure enough as they walked behind each set piece and was shown briefly to the audience in between, the kids FREAKED OUT. There was major screaming and giggling and this prompted the cast to give the kids a bit of a show. Some hopped between sets and others wagged their 'tails' a bit as they strolled by. I put the kibosh on this as the kids started to get a little out of control.

The reason I wanted them to stop was that I was worried the teachers would get annoyed with their kids and shush them forcefully. I know this sounds silly but an angry or annoyed shush from a teacher or guardian can quell the kids not just for the pre-show...but the entire show. They will be too scared to clap and too scared to enjoy themselves for fear of being shushed by their teachers. This is a tragedy in the world of children shows.

As I expected the teachers started yelling and shushing at the kids making the outcome a subdued audience. They became more lively towards the end of the show when they realized they wouldn't get yelled at for enjoying themselves but most of the first half was a giggle every now and then and not knowing when to clap. Albeit this could also be attributed to just a general ignorance to theatre going conventions...which to be honest from grades K-3 is understandable.

Load out went smoothly then we had our first 'family' or company meal together in Applebee's ( a good ol' standby if all the town restaurants look sketchy). We chatted about the upcoming travel day we had among other things and then headed back to NYC.

Today we had our first travel day. We met at the garage at 10:00AM and arrived at our destination, Wysox, PA, at about 2:00PM. The drive was great although I am not a fan of driving through PA. The roads are twisty turny and the drivers are as well. Upon arriving at the hotel we all agreed to meet in the lobby around 3 for food. We asked the receptionist where we should go and her manager, who was looming over her shoulder, instantly pointed to the restaurant that had a poster plastered to every wall and window. He said 'You'll definitely want to go there'. We shrugged and off we went, about a mile away. We laughed at how insistent he was on us going to this specific establishment and assumed he owned the joint.

We arrived at the restaurant and sure enough about 5 minutes after ordering our food the manager of the hotel showed up. Our eyes popped wide and we all ducked our heads to avoid him seeing us giggle. At dinner we discussed possibly dressing up in themes for Halloween (some ideas were title characters of 90's TV shows or Clue) Later that evening Sarah, who plays Maddy in the show, was looking at the Wysox Facebook page and discovered it only had 3 fans and the town population was 1,204! The manager of our hotel probably created the acebook page...hell he probably was the mayor of the town. It just goes to show...there is no town too small for Click, Clack, Moo. We perform to towns of aaaalll populations.

Tomorrow we have a 9:30AM and a 12:30PM. Load in time is 7:30AM...Hoorah for coffee!

I leave you with a picture of me driving Cargo Cathy wearing Cameron's sunglasses.

Cameron's foxy 'Bro' glasses as he calls them.

The Beginning...Again.

I'm sitting in a rehearsal hall in Chelsea Studios awaiting the beginning of a rehearsal day. I am drinking a vente Chai Tea Latte and munching a buttery croissant (my pastry of choice). The actor's are filtering in for the start of our 10th rehearsal and we are discussing the ratio of quality to trashiness on TrueBlood. It's the second week of rehearsals and the cast and I can't wait to get out on the road.

I am a Stage Manager for a TheatreWorks USA show called Click, Clack, Moo. This show is one of many that the company sends across America (including Alaska) and parts of Canada. Other shows include Junie B. Jones, Fancy Nancy and other Stories, Charlotte's Web, We The People and A Christmas Carol. Those are just a small sample of the shows that are sent out. This Fall season my tour is traveling around the Southwest, west coast and around Thanksgiving we are being flown to Alaska.

TheatreWorks USA is important to the younger audiences of America, not only are we teaching children how to properly participate and watch live theatre but every show comes with it's own morale or theme. My show, Click, Clack, Moo's theme is compromise and negotiation. 'You have to give a little, to get a little' as the character of Jenny instructs Farmer Brown, the grandfather and main antagonist of the play. However as the play also teaches kids about going on strike, this can sometimes backfire. We have received letters from slightly amused/frustrated parents telling us how their kids loved the show so much that they have taken the lesson to heart and gone on strike by refusing to clean their rooms.

 So how this touring process works is the show casts 6 equity actors who double as Assistant Stage Manager's and work with me as we travel across the country. We rehearse for 2 weeks and then are off on the whirlwind adventure. We travel with two Dodge Sprinters, one van holds the set, props, costumes and sound equipment. The other van is utilized for passenger and luggage transportation. The actors and I take turns driving these mobile monsters from city to city. 

Our performances usually begin at 10:00 which means we have to be at the venue at 8:00AM to load in all the necessary components of the show.  We usually get 1.5 hours to set up and then 30minutes before GO. After the show (sometimes we have more than 1), we take down the set, pack up and get back on the road.

It is a non stop and exhausting process but there is nothing more rewarding than seeing a show well executed and the looks on the kid's excited faces as they chatter about who their favorite character was. Something to keep in mind is that we don't only perform in theatres. We also perform in small gym-caffe-toriums in elementary schools, sometimes they are so small we can't put up the entire set. Most of the kids in these schools have never seen live theatre, we are exposing them to an element of life that may have gone overlooked if we had not performed in that school. Its a satisfying moment when you realize you are opening kids up to new experiences.

So here I am. Leading this band of actors and our two massive sprinter vans across the country (and at some point flying to Alaska, more on that later). We will have adventures, misadventures and a whole lot of shenanigans in between. I will be discussing our day to day performances and the crazy situations the cast and I find ourselves in along the way. I will leave today's post with a picture of the set on a stage in Altoona, PA and our current itinerary!

Click, Clack, Moo set at the Mishler Theatre

Sep 21 10:00AM Viola Elementary School Suffern, NY

Sep 22 TRAVEL DAY to Wysox, PA

Sep 23 9:30 / 12:30 Keystone Theatre Towanda, PA

Sep 24 9:30 / 12:30 Sayre Theatre Sayre, PA

Sep 25 TRAVEL DAY to Vandalia, OH

Sep 26 DAY OFF Vandalia, OH

Sep 27 TRAVEL DAY to Eureka, MO

Sep 28 TRAVEL DAY to Alma, AR

Sep 29 9:30 / 1:30 Alma Performing arts Center Alma, AR

Sep 30 11:30 Tulsa Performing Arts Center Tulsa, OK

Oct 1 9:30 / 11:30 / 7:00PM  Tulsa Performing Arts Center Tulsa, OK

Oct 2 11:00 Tulsa Performing Arts Center Tulsa, OK

Oct 3 DAY OFF Tulsa, OK

Oct 4 TRAVEL DAY to Dallas, TX

Oct 5 10:00 Majestic Theatre Dallas, TX

Oct 6 TRAVEL DAY to Houston, TX

Oct 7 9:30 The Rice School Houston, TX

Oct 8 9:30 / 11:30 One World Austin, TX

Oct 9 11:00 / 1:00 One World Austin, TX

Oct 10 DAY OFF Austin, TX

Oct 11 TRAVEL DAY to Palestine, TX

Oct 12 9:30 / 12:30 Crockett Civic Center Crocett, TX

Oct 13 TRAVEL DAY to Artesia, NM

Oct 14 DAY OFF in Artesia, NM

More to come...